How To Balance Motherhood and Entrepreneurship

For the longest time, after becoming a mom for the first time, I struggled daily to get a super long to-do list done. To keep the house clean. To sustain some type of social life. To do all of the things I used to do before having a baby. To get a thousand tasks done for my business. I even remember breastfeeding my first child while typing emails to prospective clients and creating marketing campaigns. I have always been the queen of to-do lists, action plans, and multi-tasking. 

But, since having my second child, I am finally really "getting it". There will be days when it feels like "nothing" at all gets done. And that's okay, as long as the kids are happy, healthy, and safe. But the biggest thing for me to remember, is that it is all about their perspective. I could be having an incredibly frustrating day, but in their eyes, they had THE best day. They couldn't care less if the house looks like a mess, or if the laundry didn't get done. All they want is their parents' undivided attention and to spend special moments daily. Even if it is just cuddling on the couch while they eat a snack. Or tossing a ball around in the backyard. Or reading a book before bed every night. Or just belly laughing at something silly. As long as THEY are the only focus during these moments, that is all that matters to them. 

The pressure of feeling like I needed to continue "getting things done" while balancing a newborn through the day, was completely unrealistic. And, combined with some postpartum depression after my first, I was soon spiraling into a burn out that abruptly landed me in the hospital facing a serious health issue with a very loud wakeup call that I could no longer ignore.

It soon became very clear to me that it is all about the proper balance. It is not reasonable or realistic to think that you can run a business plus take care of everything else at home while also taking care of babies and little kids at a "perfect" level. Because "perfect", my friends, does not exist. It just doesn't. And, if you try to do all of the things at a superhuman level at the same time all the time, I promise you, something is going to have to give. 

I am probably one of the biggest advocates out there when it comes to encouraging someone to start a business, and showing people how to strike that fine balance managing a family while also being productive. However, if you try to do it all, at the same time, all day everyday, it will not be sustainable in the long run. Trust me. 

So what is the solution? Everyone is different, but this is what was a life saver for me: Plan out your day. Block times out to work on anything business or work related during times of the day when the kids are either napping, sleeping, at school, in childcare, or when you have someone over giving you an extra hand.

Sure, cleaning the house and running errands with the kids in tow is just a necessity most days, but make it a priority to do any other type of "focus" work around their schedule. When they are up, make them the priority as much as possible. Sure, it may take a little longer this way. And some days, maybe NOTHING extra gets done at all. But that is okay. You CAN do it all, but not at the same time, all of the time, basically. 

For your sanity, this is going to be crucial. And ask yourself - how much work are you really getting done on a daily basis while your kids are craving your attention? Allocate some undivided time every day for just THEM. This may mean turning your cell phone off and placing it in a different room to avoid the temptation of checking for messages and updates during this time. I promise you, it's all they really need and want. And, it will make you feel like the rockstar mom that you are, when you make sure it happens no matter what. 

The truth is, after becoming a mom for the first time, there is an adjustment period. A phase of figuring it all out. You go from primarily focused on your self and your own needs, to suddenly having a tiny human who depends on you for their every single little need. It can get overwhelming and many women in fact also lose a little bit of self identity while figuring out this new norm. The takeaway - realize that things are now different, but in a good, absolutely amazing "different" new way.

Your babies will only be little and wanting your attention for a short period of time - embrace it and enjoy every moment. You WILL get to where you want to be in your business and life, even if you are taking smaller and slower steps than you planned. No matter how slow you are moving forward, as long as you are still moving ahead and following your plan, it WILL happen in due time!